I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a good person. Richard and I live our lives according to our own set of innate rules; rules that govern our minds, our heart, and our generosity.
Quite simply, we believe that while we’re on this earth we should be governed by the goodness in our hearts, that we should be kind to others, put good karma out there, be decent people because that’s what ‘right’.
Neither of us attends church. I grew up Catholic - attended Sunday mass, was involved in youth worship (now I can’t be bothered to go, the church I was raised in just isn’t the right fit for me) Richard grew up not attending mass/service/worship of any sort. And I can tell you quite certainly that he’s the more generous, thoughtful, and all around helpful individual in this pairing. So I struggle to know how organized religion has any place in our lives. I sure as heck didn't turn out any better than my wonderful significant other who lacked the direction that my religious worship supposedly gave me. His direction came from that innate sense of goodness that I truly believe all individuals have in their souls.
I always thought I would want to raise children in a faith-filled environment, but I’m not sure if that faith-filled environment needs to be 'church'. The dilemma for me lies in, this question, “Is it easier for us to instill generosity of spirit, life, and fellowship on our own or with the help of the ‘right’ church?” Right now, I’m struggling to find that answer and I simply don’t know….
6 comments:
i don't think being a good person and having faith are the same thing -- they're related. when you say "faith-filled environment", what is it you're having faith in? i think THAT'S the key -- what do you want to raise your children to have faith in? God? their parents? themselves? i don't think you can randomly find faith -- you have to put faith INTO something. does that make sense? and of course, this is all IMO, OFD. ;] (in my opinion, open for discussion)
I struggle with the same thing...I saw the unimaginable the other day... a young man standing on top of a parking garage threatening to jump and the only thing I could think to do was pray that everything would turn out okay...I know that's faith, and I think that's important because you don't learn that in your heart when not raised in a church...but my question is 'is that the only place to find solace?" And that's where I struggle, how do I teach (my un-born) children to do that without church?? And can you??
I don't think you can teach the kind of faith that brings solace without church because it's the very concept of God that brings solace -- not the fact that you have "faith". I mean...when you prayed, it was your praying that brought you solace. It was your faith that there was a God listening Who would do something about it that brought solace. So ultimately, it's faith in God that brings solace and faith in God is learned in church. But the wrong kind of church CAN also damage that solace...
Which is where I don't want to be... raising a child in the "wrong" kind of church...I want teach my children that God is compassionate (to every single living being regardless of age, race, gender, sexual orientation, etc.) and that inclusivity is the environment I need in a church. I think it's high time I try to find that faith community that mirrors my sensibilities.
BTW - Thanks for your comments....it's good to have someone who will debate with me these ideas....I need it. ; - )
you're very welcome! i enjoy these kinds of discussions very much, partly because i'm curious about other people's opinions but also because i like tossing ideas around. :]
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