We Are Not Our Circumstances

Becky Blanton's tear jerking story about hope

A Few of the Favs

The weather in San Francisco wasn't what I had hoped for. It was pretty much miserable. Typhoon Parma had swept some nasty weather across the Pacific. San Francisco was subject to torrential rain, a few miserable days and lots of fog and mist...which some might argue are essential San Francisco experiences. While it made sightseeing on foot challenging, I soldiered on and managed to catch a few fantastic photographs. The sun did peek out every once in a while; it was exciting I tell ya, it was everything I had expected of late summer in San Francisco.

A Catalogue of Sorts

Richard had a conference in San Francisco a short while ago, I joined him. It was always the plan, I would take a week off work, go with and enjoy a rather impromptu vacation. The trip was punctuated by the job loss, while it was nice to relax upon my return from San Francisco, knowing I wouldn't have to go back to work hurt my heart a little...well a lot really....

I have been taking some time to catalogue why I loved my job so much...what made going to work so easy...

Here's the shortlist I have come up with.

• I worked for a cause; knowing I was working for an organization that improved the lives of families in need made my heart soar.
• Each and every day I was challenged to think critically about a project and how it would benefit the community. Each day I came to understand the mission of our organization on a deeper and more meaningful level. I had to communicate, communicate, communicate what that meant to us as an organization and make sure that message was understood by others.
• I got to be an advocate and pseudo spokesperson. I LOVED speaking about the project, updating others, communicating project news,
• I connected with volunteers daily, I got to know, befriend and learn from those who cared as deeply as I about the mission. I built great relationships with board members, campaign volunteers and program volunteers.
• I learned that I have a passion for non-profit governance. I have always had an interest in all things political, but prior to this job I was only marginally aware of my love of governance...how and why organizations are run a particular way, how boards interact with senior management and what this means for strategic planning. This has lead me to some hefty reading and learning I am excited to do.
• While not a member of the senior management team, I worked incredibly closely with senior management. The Project Manager, CEO, CFO, Regional General Manager all in part became mentors to me. I learned so much from each and everyone of them, I appreciated the opportunity to work for and with people who offered me so much of themselves. They gave me opportunities to work on projects not related to the project office I worked for and because those opportunities I was able to learn, grow, even mentor others.

________________________

Some days I wallow a little, I sit on the couch watching Martha and worry I wasn't passionate enough, capable enough, talented enough to be kept around. I then remind myself that I tend to wallow in the irrational.

I am a talented employee, with vision and drive and a passion to lead, I knew the finances.... I have to remind myself that the senior management who became mentors to me are willing to help me however they can to find that fabulous next step. I know they recognized my talents and that means a lot.

The Thud

For the last two years I have been working in the non-profit industry on a very important (or at least in my mind) project. I have loved every second of the work I've done and the team I have had the pleasure of working with.

As of this past Friday I am out of work. I'm laid off. We need a major "partner" to move forward and the logical "partner" isn't moving quickly. So without that guarantee our small project office has had to downsize. We've gone from 3 to 1. My boss, my wonderful, thought provoking, supportive boss (the best boss and mentor I have ever had) is the only one left. He's trying to get the "partner" on board.

I have been aware of the project's reality since I started working there but it doesn't make the sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach go away. The first few days of the layoff seemed like a vacation; it doesn't feel like a vacation anymore. I am loving watching Martha (mmm sweet potato gnochhi) but I would love more to know that the "partner" has come on board. I know how important this project is to the community; I have worked so hard to see this get done and it hurts my heart that the project is stalled. I have always hated being stuck in a sense of limbo and that's the best way to describe where the project is - project limbo.

I wish I knew the best way to move forward myself...what to do next...but right now I am sad; the thud didn't feel so great (I know thanks captain obvious, right?). Any thoughts? Insight? Advice? Would be much appreciated...

The Swell Season

Sad music has always helped me put life in perspective; contemplative, achingly beautiful music makes me feel happy. I know it's the catharsis I crave; that I need, that makes me love this genre of music. Anyhow, I think Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova create and epitomize the type of music I love... thank you for sharing with the world your love; your beautiful music; your passion.

I can not wait for your new album to come out!

Struck a Chord

A Ted Talk on living life passionately, meaningfully, wholly and deeply. I'm certain Sandor Teszler would have been a kindred spirit of mine.

Parliament Sunset

Rich and I went on a Quebec/Ontario tour last week. We decided to drive up to Montreal visit an old friend, then slowly make our way back through Ontario stopping in our favourite Canadian cities along the way. We had a fabulous time, ate all of our favourite foods (which we're hard-pressed to find rural Ontario). Japanese, Indian, Korean, Vietnamese... mmm! It was a great week enjoying the simple pleasures of life...friends, family, dinners out, good wine, laughter and fun. Thanks to all our hosts along the way!!