A Request

Two weeks ago I stepped on my ridiculously dusty scale and stared at the number on the display slack-jawed. I had never seen a number so high in my life. I was embarrassed to admit the number to even myself so I scrambled off the scale committed to making some healthier choices, committed to not seeing that number again. The last two weeks I have been getting more water into my system, making super healthy snack choices; simply, trying to make better decisions.

I am very lucky and I know it. I live a beautiful life. I wake up every morning to a supportive and loving husband who goes out of his way to make me feel beautiful. I was raised by determined, capable women who taught me to believe that who I am inside ALWAYS matters more than how I look. Anyhow, point is, as cheesy as this is about to sound...when I wake up in the morning and look in the mirror...I see someone beautiful. And for that I am grateful.

This morning I saw myself on video.

I…didn’t…recognize…the…woman…on…the…screen. I watched it a couple of times hoping that I would come to some sense of contentedness with my appearance. It never came. I stepped on the scale to see if the choices I had been making had been working and low and behold, I had lost five pounds.

But the number staring back at me was still 201.

I’m a smart woman. I know 201 pounds on my frame is unhealthy. I am 5’6”. Have always been, as my Grandfather called me at age 12, big-boned. At my healthiest, which was 13 years ago, I weighed in at approximately 150 pounds. In all honesty 150 pounds is at the high end of the healthy range of my BMI.

All my life I have struggled with energy issues, asthma, chronic bronchitis, severe joint pain – I know, that when I am fitter, stronger, limber – the severity of these issues subside. Over the last two years I have seen an incredible increase in each and every one of the problems listed above. It’s September, I caught a cold but rather than shaking it like most healthy immune systems, it turned into a severe case of bronchitis. Three weeks later I am still hacking and wheezing.

I need to do something about this. Unless it’s Trivial Pursuit, I am not competitive in nature; so seemingly insurmountable tasks – in this case – learning to lose and keep off 50 pounds – scare the bejeezus out of me. So I am reaching out to each and every one of you for help. I know journeys, like the one I am committing myself to today, require support and belief and friends willing to pick you up and put you back on your path when you stumble. I spend a ton of time in my head naturally, so solitary workouts defeat me, running alone, working out at the gym, become frightening excursions because of what I’m left to think about. So I gravitate to team sports, supportive classes, friends to buddy up with, so I am not left to the crazy inner-workings of this scatterbrained mind.

So what I am asking you for, is to be that friend that helps point me in the right direction, ask me to join you at yoga class, keep me in mind for your hiking adventure. And if anyone were ever interested in teaching the wheezing, hacking asthmatic how to love running, I’d really love to learn.

Ummm

This blog post is a little late. I was going to post a few hours after my online book club's first attempt failed miserably but I was sad and not quite sure what to say.

But whatevs, I mean I know I didn't do enough reminding, I really should have posted some check-ins to see how you were all doing with the read. And I didn't.

So soon, I will post our next three options. And we'll try again, this time with check-ins and questions along the way in the hopes of keeping all my ten blog readers engaged in the process.

Sound good!?!

Sounds good!!

Tonight's the Night

Despite being terribly sad, commenting on the book will begin at 7:00 pm sharp!

Jack Layton will be missed, his tenacity, his fierce dedication to improving the lives of ALL Canadians was unmatched on our political sphere. Canada has lost a great man, his legacy will live on.

I think I may have the start the comments tonight with a toast...

Booking Through Thursday

What’s the first book that you ever read more than once?
I am going to leap to young-adulthood, because there's no need to rehash the children's books I made my mother read over and over again. But the first book I remember reading repeatedly was Anne of Green Gables.

What book have you read the most times? And how many times?
I have read every book in the Anne of Green Gable's series multiple times. I have read Rilla of Ingleside (the last book), oh, about ten times.

What about you? What book have you read over and over and over...? Do you have a book you read once a year at approximately the same time?

I'd love to know which books never get old....

And...

The Paris Wife has won...clearly!

I will be snacking on Brie cheese, a nice baguette and some grapes.

I plan to drink this wine. Your favourite Beaujolais will do just fine if you can't get your hands on this one.

Seriously though, time for me to get reading. I've been hearing I may have been overly ambitious with my deadline.

I'm really looking forward to the 22nd...cheese sure....but I hope you are too!

My Experimental Book Club

I gave up on my blog.

While I love writing, I was finding it so incredibly difficult to find motivation and write authentic pieces. Seeing that authenticity has always been so important to me, I stopped when I felt I was finding nothing but banality in my heart.

I needed time to revisit my motivation for writing. I needed to understand why I was doing this. And really came up with only one reason. I want to share what my passion, in all its wonderfully geeky wholesomeness, is.

So to that end…

I love books. Always have, always will. I love delving into a good read in the comfiest corner of the house with a cozy blanket and a couple hours for me and my “friend”.

And I have always wanted to have a book club that’s meaningful to me. I want to share the books I love with all the people in my life that love reading like I do.

So I am starting an online book club, so that no matter where you live, how far away you are from me, you can be a part of my awesome book club and join in the conversation. Hopefully interspersed within the postings about the club I'll manage to share something witty and engaging (generally focused on my secondary loves...politics, wine, photography, food, design, fashion) here and there.

This is how it’s going to work.

We vote on the books below

1) The Paris Wife by Paula McLain
2) The Art of Racing in the Rain by Gath Stein
3) Sanctuary Line by Jane Urquhart

Voting ends Sunday July 24th at 7:00 pm EST. I will post the winning book, along with a themed snack and a matching wine on Monday July 25th (participate in the foods if you so wish)!

We then meet back here, on Monday August 22nd at 7:00 pm EST, to have a conversation via the comment section on the blog.

Bear with me, this first month is intended to be a test. I don’t know how the conversation will work out doing it all via the comments section. If it doesn’t work I will refine for next month, give a new discussion method a chance. But maybe the hosting the discussion on the comments section will work out just fine. I have my fingers crossed!

Fire any questions my way! Here's to hoping some of you like the concept and give my experiment a whirl! Now vote!

Gatecrashing

I enjoy my escapism as much as the next girl and well a good piece of chick lit can be in order from time to time.

I have a penchant for the author Sophie Kinsella who also writes under her real name, Madeleine Wickham. So while I was travelling for work I picked up "The Gatecrasher" in the hopes that Ms. Wickham would provide me with an entertaining easy read.

And to be honest, I enjoyed the book quite thoroughly. That is until the last 30 pages or so.

I found the characters genuinely likeable; they were both flawed and honest (by times). Wickham managed to weave an intriguing story that kept me reading. But the last 30 pages struck me as a rushed ending, an author who was struggling to get to make a deadline, hoping that her readers didn't miss the storytelling left untold.

I certainly missed the ending the book should have had.